Tag: The Simpsons

  • A Recipe for Disaster

    Have any of you seen an episode of The Simpsons where Lisa becomes a vegetarian? If you haven’t, too bad, because it has a lot to do with my first paid review on this blog.

    Lisa: They can’t seriously expect us to swallow that tripe.
    Skinner: Now as a special treat courtesy of our friends at the Meat Council, please help yourself to this tripe. [Class cheers and runs to table loaded with tripe.]
    Lisa: Stop it Stop IT! Don’t you realize you’ve just been brainwashed by corporate propaganda?
    Janie: Hmmph, apparently my crazy friend here hasn’t heard of the food chain.
    Uter: Yeah, Lisa’s a grade A moron!
    Ralph: When I grow up, I’m going to go to Bovine University.

    Joel Spolsky has his underpants in a bunch because spoiled grade A… I mean, A-list bloggers are currently being showered with fancy laptops, all expenses paid trips and other goodies by PR agencies. Next thing we’ll see is the Webbys attendees start getting Emmys-like gift baskets. It’s a widely known fact in the entertainment industry: if you want the A-listers to attend your crappy awards show, you better give them some stuff that they can buy with their pocket money.

    Since I am not an A-list blogger, nobody is trying to bribe me with a drool-inducing HDTV TIVO or a shiny new laptop, so if I want to shed some of my credibility, I’ll have to do some work. I decided to try out the very controversial http://www.reviewme.com.

    The deal is simple: an advertiser asks me to write a review on my blog, and if I do, I get some money. I do have pretty good pagerank and a decent amount of readers (aka blog juice), so after a month or so of waiting, I got my first paying reviewee, chefs.com. They want me to review their recipes. Fine. Off to http://www.chefs.com/recipes/default.aspx I go. I do like to cook, and I do use recipe sites all the time.

    The last time I searched for a recipe I was looking to do curry. See, I purchased this really awesome Maharajah Style Curry Powder from PENZEYS Spices. It’s pricey, but unlike curry powder that you might find in a supermarket, it’s made out of the best and freshest ingredients with a pound of Kashmir saffron for every 50lb of curry.

    So I type in “curry” into chefs.com and sort by cook time (a seemingly useful feature). What do I get? 133 results overall, which is not stellar, but a number of curry recipes that take 0 minutes to prep and 0 minutes to cook. A boon to a busy web developer and blogger like myself. Just to think that I was using Joe Grossberg’s How to Make a Simple Curry “Anything” that takes whole 15 minutes!

    Ok, so the supefast curry recipe turned out to be just a case of bad data, a lazy developer and a company (it could be that it consists of that one lazy developer) that does not use it’s own product(or does not care about it).

    Moving on. Some time ago I had to look up a recipe for another exotic delicacy, İşkembe çorbası. It’s a Turkish soup made of tripe. I have it regularly at a Turkish restaurant near my house, and it’s extremely delicious. Tripe can be very tasty when prepared right.

    So I type in “tripe” into chefs.com. Here’s what I get:

    To my disappointment, the first result, “Lighter Fresh Applesauce in Puff Pastry” does not contain any tripe. Neither do the rest of them.

    From what I know, recipes are not really copyrightable. Because of that, it’s possible to get a couple of cds with recipes from somewhere or just scrape the web and start your own site. For instance, the recipe for “Lighter Fresh Applesauce in Puff Pastry” shows up on different websites with the same phrasing down to “Bake puff pastry shells according to package directions.” One of the sites even has nutritional info, but also omits the source of the recipe.

    To conclude my review, chefs.com has reviews available elsewhere with one of the buggiest search interfaces I’ve ever seen. The owner of the site probably used some Bovine U-trained developers, and not that the site is generating pretty good revenue, is looking for a way to improve the search engine positioning. He or she has no clue about web development and marketing. I could provide that clue, but it’ll take a bit more than the $50 I should get for this review.

  • Freedom Cuts

    I have a friend who likes to remind me that my taste is highly atypical and should not be taken into consideration when coming up with new products. For instance, Fox cancels any show that I start to really like. Firefly, The $treet, Futurama – all mistreated and gone. The Simpsons weren’t cancelled, but somehow changed by Fox to become unappealing to me. Strange but true.

    Right now Fox is promoting a new show, Prison Break. Recently they turned a little raised plaza in front of the Newscorp Building into a “Fox River State Penitentiary”, complete with signs, a barbed wire fence, and a whole bunch of dudes in prison jumpsuits handing out nailfiles and fake tattoos with the show’s logo.

    There were also free henna tattoos as well as free buzzcuts. I was very much surprised at how popular the buzzcuts were with the office crowd.


    Ad:
    You know what’s missing from The Simpsons today? Bite. There’s no bite left in them. And I don’t know, something else too. It’s still there in the old seasons, but somewhere along the way either Homer jumped the shark both literally and figuratevely.

    A relatively well known fact is that Groening started his career with a “Life Is Hell” comic which was about bulgy eyed rabbits instead of bulgy eyed humans. It had what the Simpsons is missing these days.

  • Broken Metaphors

    John Travolta vehicle “Broken Arrow” has made colorful DoD slang pertaining to nuclear weapon “whoopsies” popular . Here’s an official version, and here’s how I understand them. With examples, of course.

    Nucflash
    Detonation or unauthorized launch of a nuclear weapon that might start a war
    What Captain Kong did in “Dr. Strangelove

    Broken Arrow
    Like Nucflash, but without war starting and stuff
    What Jack Bower did in a “24” episode

    Empty Quiver
    Nuclear weapon stolen or misplaced
    What evil Scientologist John Travolta did in “Broken Arrow” (ironic, I know)

    Rogue Spear
    Empty Quiver is confirmed
    Again evil Scientologist , blah blah.

    Bent Spear
    Major accident where a nuke gets dropped, damaged or even burned, but does not detonate
    Something like this

    Dull Sword
    Guard asleep, weapon duct taped to the plane, etc. Business as usual
    Hiring people who did this, snapped a photo and posted it on the web.

    Faded Giant
    Nuclear power plant meltdown
    What Homer Simpson did in numerous episodes of “The Simpsons

    With capitalism being what it is, makes the best of a somber situation. In case of Broken Arrow you can always order some flowers from Broken Arrow Florists.

  • TT : Homer Shrugged

    1) The trilogy that I actually care about is complete. The Golden Transcendence : Or, The Last of the Masquerade is here, and it doesn’t dissapoint. I’ll write my review soon.

    Is it just me, or did the book jacket’s designer rip off Zhaan from Farscape?

    (image from http://farscape.bittersweetblue.net)

    2) Ebay auction: The Simpsons Homer as Atlas A La Carte Statue

    Very impressive.

    3) How a google search for video drivers helped ‘s mom grow her vocabulary.
    Isn’t technology wonderfull?

    4) Learned about this in “This Old House Magazine”. There’s a company that makes a table saw that senses the change in capacitance between wood and human (and as this demo shows, pigeon) flesh and stops momentarily.

    Watch the videos here. would probably get a kick out of that.

    5) There was an article in the Bulletin about Atoms for Peace.
    Dammit, where’s my Ford Nucleon?

    (image from conceptcarz.com)