Spyware and construction contractors are very bad for my health. For instance, recently, the contractor who renovated my apartment asked for my help with cleaning out yet another spyware infestation. To express his gratitude he gave me a present that his sister brought with her from her trip to Ukraine. A piece of genuine Ukrainian salo.
Salo is an Eastern European staple that for some strange reason is virtually unknown in the West. Wikipedia describes it as salted slabs of pork underskin fat. It’s not really bacon – salo mostly consist of unrendered fat (bacon has more meat) and can be eaten raw.
If you’ve never had salo, it’s most similar to the taste and texture of little pieces of fat found in some harder kielbasas. In its fried form salo resembles bacon and pork rinds, except it’s much tastier. Also, you really can’t make exceptional borscht or fried sunflower seeds without high quality salo.
Here’s a piece (Ukr. “shmatok”) of salo on my official Jamie Oliver cutting board. I used my sashimi knife to cut it into thin slices – the best way to eat, in my opinion.
It’s kind of hard to describe the taste and texture of Ukrainian salo. The texture of it is hard, yet it melts on your tongue. It’s salty, fatty, garlicky. Your caveman instincts make your brain fire “wow, inhale this right now” messages, yet the little Surgeon General in your head tells you “wow, this will clog up your arteries good.” They don’t call salo “Ukrainian cocaine” for nothing.
The little Surgeon General in your head is wrong, though. Having come into possession of this authentic salo for the first time in years, I just had to kick it up a notch and make the _ultimate_ in unhealthy treif food. I had to make the legendary confection – “salo in chocolate”.
This confection started as a joke playing on Ukrainians’ fondness of salo. Then some Russian and Ukrainian restaurants started making it as an exotic delicacy. Then someone started to make a candy bar of that name. The Wikipedia article has more on that.
I tempered some good semi-bitter chocolate and dipped thin slices of salo into it.
The flavor is outstanding. Chocolate goes well with salty, fatty salo. It tastes as good as it is unhealthy. Overall, though, the quantity that I made is probably no worse than a movie theater popcorn or the bun of death from the vending machine at work. In fact, probably healthier.
If you are curious, you can find salo in most Russian food stores in New York. It will probably be lower quality Canadian salo, but it will give you a pretty good idea.
You can find more of my gastronomic adventures here.
Man, you salo is good! eat more salo!
btw, you can frie with eggs salo..its a delishes!
Oh my god!!! Salo in chocklate!!! You must be nuts =))) Although my friend eats salo with sweet cookies =)
In Odessa semechki are usually fried in a greased pan – otherwise the salt is not going to stick. I’ve always done it that way.
In Sacramento one of the Russians stores on their grand opening day had small pieces of salo dipped in chocolate fountain on a toothpics, that were handed out to people who wanted to try it.
I’m wondering how do you make fried sunflower seeds with salo? As far as I know “semechki” fried without any fat and may be with dash of salt.
But return to the subject – there’s no better snack to accompany good vodka than salo, fresh rye bread and onion. Just make you life worthwhile :)
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In Scotland you can buy deep fried mars bar, fat on the outside and chocolate in the middle.
Man, that looks good. How did they manage to get it into the country? I’d love to know, because it’s illigal to bring it into U.S.
Ha, I didn’t know that. I guess she didn’t declare it. Lot’s of good stuff is theoretically illegal, but in practice gets into the country in small quantities – Cuban cigars, Absinth. Althought there’s probably a better chance drug sniffing dogs could find salo :)
Yeah, fried candy bars and oreo cookies are supposedly very popular in the South of the US. I am a big fan of Haggis, by the way.
Disgusting! It must be even worse than dried fish in sugar coating (I thought it was a practical joke from my chinese coworkers, but turned out it is a very popular snack). But salo v shokolade is a joke!
It sounds vaguely disgusting, so there’s a high possibility I will try it someday. I (heart) haggis, too. This sentence does not bode well, though… “When salo has been aged too long, or exposed to light, the fat may become oxidized on the surface and become yellowed and bitter-tasting. Then it can be used as a water-repellent treatment for leather boots or as a bait for mouse traps.”
Sure, salo spoils. Everything spoils at some point.
I’ve had that dried fish snack – it’s not too bad.
I am pretty sure that Absinth is no longer illigal, I’ve seen it in bars.