Three Firsts

I always thought that the quote went “I’ll try anything once” and it was Andy Warhol who said it. Apparently the quote is “I’ll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure” and it belongs to Mae West.

Living in New York, amongst other things, pushes you to try something for the first time ever almost every single day. Here are three things I recently tried for the first time, mostly under pressure from New York City.

Religious

Probably every New Yorker that looks even remotely Semitic in appearence has been repetidly asked “Are you Jewish?” by the Hasidim. If you answer yes, you’ll get a Billy Mays-worthy pitch to pray/light Shabbat candles/put on at Teffilin. I will admit to occasionally denying my membership in the tribe when in a hurry, but most of the time my answer is “a little bit”, followed by a firm sticking to plain cowardly agnosticism.

Ever since I wrote a long and rambling post about Tefillins, I meant to put one on. So this one time, after being approached by a young Hasid in the Atlantic station passageway, and customarily declining his pamphlet, I accepted his halfhearted offer to help me lay Teffilin. He was particularly surprised – I don’t really think he gets to help a lot of people perform this particular mitzvah a lot.

He produced a Tefillin set from a black shopping bag and a loaner kipah from a pocket, helped me put it on and say the necessary prayers right there on the BMT’s Atlantic Avenue platform, amongst the hustle and bustle of people and trains. It felt strange, yet somehow very comforting – performing this ritual in one of the most familiar places to me.

He also gave me a pamphlet in which the Lubavitcher Rebbe explains to a computer science professor that Tefillin is a symbolic representation of computers. He was very glad to be able to accomplish such an epic mitzvah.

Culinary

I was walking through Union Square farmers’ market, already having sampled and bought a package of organic bacon hawked by an upstate hippie (I’m not a very observant Jew as you might have already noticed in this post). I was passing by a little stall providing free samples of wine made by hippies somewhere upstate. That bit of hippie bacon called for some wine, but I did not want to fight the mob of greedy Manhattan housewifes for a tiny sip, but then I heard a magical phrase – “We also have dandelion wine”.

I never really finished reading “Dandelion Wine” by Ray Bradbury, and always thought that there was no such thing – how can you make wine out of bitter yellow flowers? Apparently this is how. I bought a bottle. All I have to say is that dandelion wine tastes just like they say it should: like summer and childhood. I also bought some salad corn shoots that I’ve read about in New York Times. Those tasted like raw corn kernels.

Automotive

You know that nobody really drives in New York because there are too many cars there. I’ve spent many happy car-less years here, but the arrival of a baby forced me to buy a car (a minivan, in fact). Parking is a very sore topic around these parts. I was never willing to splurge on a garage, and had to subject myself to the indignities of alternate side parking regulations.

There’s a whole book about parking in NYC – Calvin Trillin’s brilliant Tepper Isn’t Going Out. I bought it only because I have a friend named Tepper, but ended up immensely enjoying it. Which is what I can’t say about parking in the street.

Well, recently, I finally broke down and shelled out $200 for a spot in a garage. The feeling on the “alternate” days is rather novel – hey, I don’t need to move a car! Also new – not worrying about what those loud teenagers are probably doing to my poor car, or if there’s a used car window repair place that just received a shipment of my car’s specific windows (did you notice how they always have a used window for your car ready, no matter how obscure, when you go to a nearest car window shop for a mysteriously shattered one?). It’s a new and pleasant feeling.

What about you?

241 thoughts on “Three Firsts

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  235. Awesome post!

    Dandelion wine seems easy to make. Finding dandelions somewhere that aren’t covered in dog pee is probably a lot harder.

    And $200 for a garage in Brooklyn??? That’s ridiculous. Over on JohnSt. downtown there was one for $300 in Manhattan. I would have thought it would be cheaper near you, however there are probably a LOT more people with cars.

  236. Yes, locavores probably shouldn’t go for Central Park dandelion wine :)
    As far as garage prices, it’s all supply and demand: they built a “professional plaza” were a large muni parking was. The only alternative I could find was $70 a month parking in a backyard. It invloved a large rusty gate locked by a large rusty lock and squizing in between a newish BMW and a huge old clanker with only a few inches of clearence after a hard turn. I’m not exadurating the clearence – I would have had to exit through the hatch door.

  237. Over the years, I’ve met a lot of interesting people and witnessed some odd events during alternate side parking. I must say having our driveway and garage in Brooklyn changed our lives significantly even though it removed us from one element of social culture in the neighborhood.

  238. I am 100% atheist and 100% Jewish, and Salem and I have started making it a tradition to light candles, drink wine, eat challah and say the accompanying prayers on Friday evening. We then have dinner and stay in for the night, a peaceful end to an often hectic week.

    Theology aside, I think there is some value to our religion’s rituals.

    My firsts?

    Religious: See above; we are not shomer shabbos, but I am observing the Sabbath in some manner, for the first time since I was a child.

    Automotive: As of tomorrow, we are car-less. We will probably buy a Zipcar membership, but the $200/m garaging, the insurance and the general upkeep are not worth it for a vehicle we use roughly once a month.

    Culinary: I discovered a new treat, via our farmer’s market — ramps, a form of wild leeks that are quite popular in West Virginia (where most of the DC Farmer’s Market participants grow their wares). They look sort of like fat scallions, and are fantastic when chopped up and sauteed for omeletes.

  239. I’d do Zipcar too, but they don’t have too many minivans. There are a few zipcars in the same garage. I’ll wait until the baby carriage stage is over and switch to Zipcar.

  240. What about you?

    I’ve started attending Mass again, after eight years of not going.

    I auditioned for, and was accepted for, a part in a play here in town. 6 10-minute stories about men, woman and their lives and loves. I play Death.

  241. Part of the practices of Judaism – even if one is a religiously dedicated atheist – are practices of a civilization, of a culture (see Mordecai Kaplan). The acts, like using tefillin, lighting candles, having a Shabbos dinner with family, thinking about the foods you eat (and denying some animals to yourselves that might be tasty if baconized, but, when alive, are more sentient than dogs and cats), helps to bring about a few sparks of holiness in our daily lives (whether one sees holiness as the works of a deity or merely the result of triggering of certain brain chemicals).

    In any event, cutting off most aspects of one’s cultural traditions because of their connection to religion, or because one wants to assimilate with the Borg, or because one has limited or incorrect knowledge or fears about the tradition, is a pretty sad thing. There is value in their practice beyond the connection to G-d, just as there is value in the practice of yoga beyond its connection to Hinduism.