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  • Michael Krakovskiy 12:38 am on March 10, 2003 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Boots, , Darth Vader, Footwear, Goods, Neoprene, , , Waders   

    The Not So Darth Waders 

    Since everyone liked my last fishing post so much, I’ll do another one on the topic. For those of you who are not into fishing, hunting or sewer exploration, I’ll explain. Waders have nothing to do with Darth Vader, although they were probably named after the old English word for water. They are special waterproof pants with boots attached that allow you to keep dry while standing in water. They are usually made out of rubber or neoprene. I own a pair of neoprene Red Ball® brand waders. Yeah, I know. Ha, ha – red balls. It’s a good brand, dammit.

    Well, I knew about this for a while – there is a company that produces “Women in Waders ™” calendars.

     
  • Michael Krakovskiy 3:06 am on November 9, 2002 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Bill Clinton, , , Footwear, , Interdimentional police, interdimentional travel, Jerry Seinfeld, , Sock, , ,   

    Meanwhile, in the Butter Dimention 3 

    I truly believe in parallel dimensions. Come on, how else can we explain the great missing sock mystery? Subjected to about 100 G in your washing machine, socks, being one of the smallest articles of clothing, simply disappear from our dimension and drift into another.

    Jerry Seinfeld has an alternative theory involving a dryer: “The dryer is their only chance to escape and they all know it. They plan it in the hamper the night before. “Tomorrow, the dryer. I’m going”” I don’t buy that , because it implies that socks are sentient.

    Socks may be the most common interdimentional travelers, but other objects can disappear and reappear under normal conditions.

    Interdimentional police is looking for the following items on my request.

    • A book “Barbarians Led By Gates”. I’ve read half of it, and then it disappeared into the Ether. Damn, it’s a good book. I’ll have to order another one.
    • My titanium wedding band. I am not sure about interdimentional travel here because a) I’ve lost a lot of weight and it could have slipped of my now thinner finger on a fishing trip or b) the cat could have eaten it.
    • A book of Russian translations of Japanese science fiction writers. Disappeared years ago. I was in the middle of an interesting story.
    • A book about fishing in the Black Sea (also in Russian)
    • “Harvey Wang’s New York”. Black and white photo book purchased in Strand bookstore.

    I think that books and rings possess a special shape, which encounters the least resistance slipping into interdimentional space. Donuts probably too. I’ve seen three dozen Krispy Kremes disappear in under a minute.

     
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